We are all unique, we cannot all parent the same. However there is one rule that will work in every scenario that a Step Mother is faced with. Love and react with the deep love you carry in your heart for your children.
Step Mothers come in all shapes, sizes, and personalities. I would say most of us love our titles, some of us feel slightly burdened by it, and we have all felt hurt in our role for certain. I wish there was a rule book. A clearly written “how to” book with understandable numbered steps that I could apply to my life. The reality is that there is no such thing.
Every situation is going to be different, childless Step Mothers, blended families, all sorts of different variables. Not only are our circumstances different , but it is the people that we have to interact with too. Some of us have beautiful relationships with our step children, others really have to battle everyday and may not get much affection at all. In some cases the bio Mom and Step Mom all get along, and others want to pull each others hair out.
When we are faced with a difficult situation and are unsure how to react, there really is only one rule that applies. React out of the love you have for your children. Putting the kids first you really can’t go wrong. I didn’t say that the advice would always be easy to adhere to. I know how badly you want to lash out hurting. Sometimes we have to self sacrifice now to win in the long run.
After the dust settles, I see the love that shines in my boys eyes when they look at me. When they need advice on what is the right thing to do, they come to me. Not because I am Mother Theresa or that I have all of the answers, they ask because they know I will be honest and send them down the path of making the right decision. I have gained their trust by always putting their interest first in my life when other adults that are around them have not.
Loving your children deeply, you never really can go wrong.
~ Amy Elizabeth
Photo: This one was snapped in my flower garden last year. It is a delphinium getting ready to bloom.