MISTAKES OFTEN ARE NOT PRETTY

SheThe details may not be pretty, but we should do what we can to make the whole beautiful again.

Mistakes stink.  We all have made them, many haunt us for days, weeks, and years to come.  It’s the lessons we learn and the rebuilding from them that matter.

I don’t know about you, but when I make a mistake I get angry.  I can get more angry at myself than I can at anyone on the planet.  When I make a mistake I often keep it to myself.  I hold the disappointment inside and it festers.  If my mistake is in danger of being brought to life, and I am asked about it – I explode.  Not so good…I need to get better at not being such a perfectionist.

Life is full of mistakes, often they are ugly.  As bad as you may want to, you can never go back and fix what was done.  Mistakes are often forgiven, but rarely forgotten.  When it comes to relationships within a family disappointment and the loss of respect is the bruise that is left behind.

Our tongues can be so quick.  My husband often says that he was born without a filter, whatever he is thinking comes flying out of his mouth.  Sometimes it is like that though, it happens.  The answer isn’t so much to learn how to hold our tongues, of course that would be very helpful.  The answer is to try to change our way of thinking.  If negative thoughts are always flying around in your head, that is what is going to come out of your mouth.  Staying positive inside will help prevent you from saying negative comments.

If you do flubber it up, own it.  Admit that you made a mistake and apologize for it.  If you can amend your actions you should. The three A’s:  Admit, Apologize, and Amend.  If you keep those three words handy the damage from the mistake won’t nearly be as bad.  Imagine if your child made a mistake and then applied the three A’s with you, I bet you would be pretty impressed…I would teach them the same lesson.

The three A’s will help cover up some of the ugly like a great coverage make up would.  Now you have to move forward.  If I am dwelling – it will always be over a mistake that I made, not someone else’s.  It is okay to review the situation, remember the impact it made, and hope that you won’t repeat it.  It isn’t okay to keep pouring over the details and wish that you had done something differently.  Don’t beat yourself up, you can’t change it, admit apologize and amend and be done.

If you are concerned that you wronged someone, go out of your way to do something right for them.  Our actions have way more of an impact than any of our words.  If you are sorry, show them.  Give them some of your time and attention.  Try to anticipate and meet their needs.  It does not matter if you wronged a spouse or a child, we need to put the same effort forward to correct it.

The whole can be beautiful again, just make it so.

~ Amy Elizabeth

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